Today is December 17, 2014. I am alive and well.

Before I begin, I want to say happy Chanukah to all those that celebrate this holiday.

As a young girl, I use to climb trees and dream that I was orphaned and being raised by monkeys. A thick branch of tree held my small body. The tree was in the front yard of my Grandparent’s home. Grass coated the lawn. I watched my sisters play in a side bar of the lawn that was muddy. They were making dishes. Shape the mud and let it dry. Viola, you have a bowl. I had no desire to play with them.

The craving of alone-ness would follow me into adulthood. My friends understand that I have to drift away from conversation and coffees to spend time alone in my room for hours with Grams and Annie my only company.

During this time, I read, write, and dream. I will admit that some of my dreams are of posterity. It is tiring to live paycheck by paycheck. I was in Macy’s the other day, and got depressed. Not being able to shop is like a cat wanting catnip from a ball that has no holes; the best they can do is bat it around and wish. The most I can do is try on clothes, admire them,wish, then return the shirts to the hangers from which they came.

I just spent all the money I was going to spend on Andrew, my new beau, on Annie. Annie had an upper respiratory infection. Cat visit plus $66 for the antibiotic. I nearly sat down and tapped the floor as if summoning a genie with a pocket full of gold. Chanukah is here. I am armed with a card for Andrew. I give him time, which I hope is a gift.

Happy holidays to all. May the New Year bring everything you dreamed of creating or having.

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One thought on “Today is December 17, 2014. I am alive and well.

  1. janeydoe57

    Been there (the Macy’s thing AND the pet bills) done that. If Andrew is worthy of you, he will appreciate the card and the time spent with you. My one pet peeve about the holidays is not being able to be as generous with gifts as I’d like to be. I have nine grandchildren. Two are getting re-gifted gift cards. Two more are getting actual gifts. The other five live out of state so I can get away with sending a card to the family as a whole. Sigh. Hope your Chanukah is wonderful in spite of the lack of funds.

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